Wednesday, April 4, 2012

What Makes You Happy

I've studied a lot of psychology, so I happen to know what actually makes people happy. Interestingly enough, it's not a life without problems. In fact, psychological happiness is a result of struggle and success. Much like a thermostat, our body and psyche constantly works on righting wrongs, that is, achieving a state most advantageous for our existence. We have different needs, but, be they psychological or physical, they all need to be catered for for us to feel comfortable. And whenever a meter returns to state "normal", the system rewards one with a feeling of relief, no, more than that: happiness.

But is this really all there is to it? Isn't there anything else science might have forgotten about? Well, you know there's always that unexplainable fraction of a percentage point that we often call nature's randomness. In humans, it often manifests in a desire to sometimes act against their best interests. Of course it has been established many times that completely selfless deeds don't exist. However, I believe that the fact that some still long for the ability to commit one shows that nature's best take on randomness, the human soul might still be too random for science to explain.

So how can you be happy if you have your human needs to deal with, plus all the special aspirations that make you who you are -- and, you're even 'gifted' with a soul and it's crazy urges, however small or human those are?
I've just read this story yesterday, and though I must have read it before (I'd already read the book it comes from), I didn't remember reading it or it having any effect on me. And even yesterday at that cafe in my lunch break didn't seem to be the right place and the right time. I even told the story to my husband later in the evening, and I said how nice it was and that one should set oneself right before wanting to change the world -- but it only dawned on me this afternoon why this story is so special.

I've made a couple of resolutions decisions recently (post coming up), and one of them was to sort out what the heck I want. So far it's proved the most difficult one (not counting my plan to take up yoga), precisely because of the sample I'm investigating. I'm one of the most indecisive people I know, and though in little things I make up for it by making impulsive decisions, relying on my instincts and intuition most of the time, big choices can take me months to make. And this one in particular has been taking years, so I've decided to put an end to it and sort myself out. However, as I said, my personality has been making it an especially hard piece of research. Finally, my return from Hungary and the realizations it triggered sobered me somewhat. I was actually shocked at how normal I felt, after so long.

And today I realized that I seem to have put the man together. I seem to have sorted out what piece of me belongs where and though I'm still not 100% certain about what I expect from my life and what I want to do with it, I have managed to set some of my false ideas straight. I'm now acting upon my real intentions and values and no longer try to conform to a role that I know doesn't fit me. I've rediscovered my dreams and heroes -- and that little part of me that believes in selfless deed.

I feel myself. I feel happy.

Thank you for reading.
Good night and sweet dreams
and happy stories that touch your lives.

hugz
fleur

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